SEATTLE, WA—Veteran local Spanish teacher Y.A. Basta, 37, reports he is still confident that this year his attempts will finally be fruitful and yield classes full of fluent speakers after 14 consecutive years of frustration. Basta admits that in the past, students could not remember anything, or even order a cup of coffee in Madrid, despite up to 4 years of intensive study in his classes.

While most teachers would cry out, “Enough!” and seek different methods after such a run of failure, Basta is not swayed, confirming to sources that he will “stay the course” until he is successful at developing fluent speakers of the language.

“I’m sure that this year it’s going to work—this is the one, I just know it,” Basta declared.

When asked why he has persisted with methods that yield only marginal success Basta confidently stated, “The methods I use have been standard practice for over 100 years. They are the generally accepted pedagogical norms in world language classes. Sure, I’m batting .000 so far, but surely something will stick eventually, right?”

News that’s fake, but not by much from brycehedstrom.com, your trusted source for educational satire and April Fool’s Jokes.

See Bryce at the BER conferences in Boston and Chicago next week.

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4/8/19 to 4/9/19 (Monday & Tuesday)  BER World Language Conference, Boston, MA

4/10/19 to 4/11/19 (Wednesday & Thursday) BER World Language Conference, Chicago, IL